the name of Dorothy somebody or another, spoken on the radio, tells me who I must look for to read. She writes for the wall street journal.
to fight against his bastard crap mouth I must study all the best writing possible
and then sell out
no no no No No NO NOOOOo NNNNNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOoooooooooooooooooooooooo
I shall begin a new rule
a new resolution added to
those already this new year
Yes YESSSS oy veh vengo con vino I come with wine
from now on — sufficient for the day is the evil thereof
From now on I will only write what we right what we
left a message on that this date and no more (yawn)
oh we shall left and right hand revise
but *unless absolutely necessary*
shall only revise on this day
repeat — sufficient for the day is the evil thereof
only on this day
then move on like flaming
anger day by two and one like when
to phuk tiburón and his "te estoy molestando, ¿verdad?"
claro que sí so much that I will never tell
anyone ever again where his page
is no not non nuncaselfish little sour grape gringo bitch mejamás as if he cares
NOT again whatever margins I transgressas if I ever did anyway ? can't remember tell anyone his blog nameHE SHOULD NEVER NEVER never have put up that photo of Celestina
it's all I can do not to put him right back in there
with a fat turd squeezing out his mouth
but he'd probably
like
i t
here's exactly
the kind of crap he
bitches, moans, and whines
about all in his mangled, fascinating
deliciously rule-broken and completely mis-spieled
S p a n i s hwhich I could never hope to equal
either for its verbose talent or insulting, childish spleen
so I'll just write about
a b o u t n o t h i n g a t a l l
1.
eating tacos on
the corner
before you catch
a bus
downtown
2.
carne asada
pastor, tripita
chorizo, suadero, cabeza
de mucho hay de
mucho
once pesos el taco
un dolar pues
en la mera esquina de
Vidal y Planos con
Bellas Artes
3.
corn tortillas
wrapped around
meat, onion, celantro, salsa
y guacamole
delight
mmmm
eating in the street
4.
the men and women
crowd around
while clouds of steam
delicious vapor
rising toward heaven
whisper that the gods should
be happy
tonight
because a good taco is so much more delicious than any angry flaming blog yes
uh huh uh huh that's the way uh huh uh huh we like it uh huh uh huh
walking downtown sidewalks againYou have to watch out for broken sidewalks. You have to watch out for tilted sidewalks that maybe are driveways that only mack trucks or monster 4 by 4's could ascend with or without apostrophes, or some kind of crazily knocked up merge between steps of twenty years ago and ramps cut into the corners for wheelchair athletes yes only athletes should dare attempt the streets and sidewalks of downtown Tijuana, but they can, you can, my chair-bound friends, if you have strong arms and a spirit of adventure you might do better than your bitchy, condescending Anna Nicole Smith wanna-be girls gone wild friends in their high heels who are condemned to community service and so tag along to take care of you without knowing you are in wayyyyy better shape than they e'en tho they still gots their legs flashing and sticking up into the air to shut off the car door lights and they then fall down wham in your lap, oh yes, you have to watch out for tilted sidewalks and broken sidewalks and no wonder fancy rich women only ride around in cars I am glad I ain't rich, not in money, but in spirit, yes, so I can ride the bus and still climb up and down for a few more years, this year, this year my father died at my age thirty years ago and I am trying not to smoke. Uh huh.
After three beers and an hour talking with David I feel almost human again, not a recluse shut up in my room drooling mental drivel over my computer keyboard. I can talk to a fellow American my fellow Americans I am hopeful you will send your children to die in Babylon for the Bush-Cheney conspiracy so come back in a box, or crippled, and we give you a plastic flag and cancel your health insurance cha ching fart and so realize why I on the left-wing, why he on the right-wing, why we both live in Mexico, instead of in the heart of madness, the horror, the beast, the monstrous lying puke and filth that our government shovels down the public, pubic, throat and they are almost all innocent they don't even know how far gone they are sold their world souls to Satan for a mess of beef stew and that's the only thing I don't like about Mexico is they all eat menudo here and the politicians are all the same no matter what and so, when I find myself actually beginning to like a certain bureaucrat in a certain office because
just because he's a human AND a Mexican
oh my God have mercy I am falling in love with humanity again, with the human race again, with these human beings
my brothers and sisters
and then it comes true. Tere does come to the art exhibit opening and we sit in their new little space in back and listen to live music and have a coffee and some of the musicians know me that's how long I've been in Tijuana one or two smile and nod, and one even touches my shoulder in a brief break between blowing on his saxophone that's how close to the little stage Tere and I are sitting and the little theater behind the old house is like a half-built construction set it is so damn beautiful rustic Tijuana slapdash construction site under construction holy cow don't have a vision that is the architecture I am in my dream they are playing music somebody pinch me NO DON'T
But I don't wake up.
Because I was not asleep. I really was there. I really had stumbled through the blocks from the Dandy to the Casa at 8:47 pm on a night of clouds and thinking every step of the way I was going to twist my ankle, trip, fall, and smash my face into a mess of dogshis and shards of broken glats spell it wrong maybe the 'bots won't notice I wonder if they're that intelligent, if YOU are that intelligent and now you know who my secret audience is, not shakey-toes no not him he's too real and too good of a writer, no, I want the A.I.s to read me not that they are secret but that I secretly desire to secrete my thoughts into their programs and buzzzz WHAM
HEY! He broke the RIDE!
Attraction, son, he broke the attraction. There are no rides in the satanagic kinkdome not.
You have to watch out for broken sidewalks. I will write what I want to. That is the beauty of self-publishing. I will write what I want to AND publish what I want to.
Gracias por su asistencia, thank you for your company, oh yes, yes yes.
am I just spinning my wheels?
he asks me last night in the Dandy
and then says the most welcome words
don't be a stranger
meanwhile the next day, today, I discover I spoke too soon last time, two days ago, when I said everything had gotten back to "normal"
the newspapers today remark that after 43 days of tranquility, the kidnappings and murders have begun again, and Tijuana has returned to the reality of crimes of high impact
if I translate write
left
yes
Amen. Goodbye.
or well... goodbye for now at least
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